Weddings are one of those wondrous dreams that can quickly become a nightmare if done incorrectly. Money, parents, in-laws, prep, and more have historically caused many a bride a big headache. So, how does one deal with possibly the biggest of setbacks to a wedding ever: money?

There are many ways to approach paying for a wedding. But there is only one that is right for you and your future husband.

The first step you should take is to go with your fiancé to talk with both of your parents. You need to know how much they can help you with, if any. Working together with your family will make a wedding so much better. Once that is established, you know how much you will need to make up for.

Secondly, you need to assess how much both you and your fiancé can plausibly contribute. Be willing to set your expectations low so that you are ready for whatever comes. It is the marriage that matters more than the wedding, and personally I would prefer to enjoy a better honeymoon then a bigger wedding. However, some would like to throw a bigger party, and that is perfectly fine.

Buy cheap. Scour Pinterest and Etsy and take ideas from the greats. Sometimes that beautiful arrangement that you see in the store can be done in two minutes with a hot glue gun and a savvy pair of hands.

If the wedding is far, off and you have time consider saving now rather than later. For those without a proposal but a hint of one, even just $20 per paycheck is more than you would have had before. For those with a set date in mind, estimate your costs and divide by the number of months it will take. For example

Buy Local. You can often go through local stores like antique or dress shops in town find beautiful additions for your wedding. You don’t have to go to a store that is specifically marked for weddings to find the right items. You might even find a beautiful and elegant dress from a local shop if you look.

Go non-traditional. If you and your hubby are people who like to set trends or go against them or just have no particular desire to have a traditional wedding, you could opt for a non-traditional wedding that doesn’t have as many elements as a traditional one. Have your ceremony outside instead of at an expensive venue. Do a reception with snacks rather than a meal.

Think of creative ways to make money. Do you like taking photographs? Consider selling some to a stock photo agency. Do you like to make things? Consider making an Etsy profile. Do you have time in the evenings or on weekends? Try babysitting or dog walking/sitting.

Whatever happens, try to enjoy the process of planning a wedding. It is supposed to be full of anticipation and excitement. Let you and your fiancé have some room to breathe and learn to love the budget you have.